by Lawrence J. J. Leonard
Ever wanted to give that all important communiqué to that ONE PERSON who needed an attitude adjustment, or just begged to be told the way it is? I am just not able to describe the passionate and righteous intensity of that process!
Sometimes that person is me. Sometimes I am the one who should receive that message. In either case, this type of message is not always delivered on time. Missing the opportunity to put someone in their place can be a really GOOD thing. A slow reaction to make this kind of response may be the BEST thing that ever happened to our Personal Brand.
We all know that there are certain people who don’t even know that they are foolish because their power and authority in business, or in our social hierarchy, protects them from getting their comeuppance.
So freaking aggravating, isn’t it?
What causes this condition?
I am describing an affliction known as Cranial-Rectal Adhesion Syndrome. Yes, some people out there suffer from CRAS. That metaphorical positioning of the human head within the large intestine, also known as the large bowel, of the gastrointestinal tract where water is absorbed and waste material is stored.
Imagine all the people who, right now, suffer from CRAS! You want to tell them, “Hey! Get your head out of your @$$!” Speaking this way will just make them defensive. What THEY SEE is only their own needs and wants – the way an infant does! Telling people that they are flawed is difficult, and it can be hurtful. Don’t talk to your boss that way, even if you are truly friends.
Here’s a sign. Do you know someone who refuses to:
- See people as humans with frailties and deficits?
- See coworkers and direct reports as stressed out?
- Treat others as intellectually capable?
Yoooooou might suffer from CRAS. Yoooooou are the one making it difficult for your relationships to grow.
Ask yourself, do I:
* Blurt out my unsolicited opinions?
* Feign sympathy?
* Ignore those I should give encouragement to?
* Kid without mercy?
* Make comparisons of me versus others?
* Manipulate people using confidential information?
* Mock the weak?
* Order around my direct reports?
* Play emotional games?
* Pressure others when I am not pressured?
* PRETEND to care?
* Reprimand with no solution?
* Subvert others actions?
* Tease unnecessarily?
* Use “I” statements?
* Yell without provocation?
* Do I believe everybody should see the world the way I do?
Every time I act out those verbs above, I HAVE CHOSEN NOT TO DO any of these below:
– Team build.
No matter what we think, it won’t mean a thing in 100 years!
People will not remember our power or looks or wealth. They will only remember how we treated each other. The key, of course, is if we want to change Human behavior, we had better be an expert on our own Human actions AND reactions. If we want peace, then we start with our own Personal Brand.
Here is what people WILL REMEMBER about us:
We chose empathy and spoke with concern.
We chose nurturing and spoke with encouragement.
So, choose persuasion. Speak with interested questions.
Choose to support. Speak with caring.
Choose to build up your team. Speak with praise.
Choose life. Speak life into your relationships.
Mellow out with the song, 100 Years, by Blues Traveler, click here.
Copyright © 1960-2019 Lawrence J. J. Leonard All rights reserved